tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-82816261812968587052024-02-07T17:55:12.428-08:00Bonfiglioli Remembered - and other stuffThis began as a tribute to an old friend, novelist Kyril Bonfiglioli, a huge influence on my own writing, which now extends to stories, poems, memoirs and half a novel.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-17906448711990200032017-09-23T10:37:00.001-07:002017-09-23T10:55:48.397-07:00Some people have asked to read the story which has just won me first prize in the Scottish Association of Writers short story competition. As well as a cheque, I get a trophy!<br />
But what pleases me most is that I first wrote it over 40 years ago. Since then it has been re-written, expanded, edited and re-edited, entered for two competitions and finally revised on the feedback from the competition organiser. Just shows what persistence can achieve.<br />
<br />
<br />
<style type="text/css">P { margin-bottom: 0.21cm; direction: ltr; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); widows: 2; orphans: 2; }P.western { font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; }P.cjk { font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; }P.ctl { font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; }A:link { }</style>
<br />
<div align="LEFT" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>You
Do Not Fight Today </b></span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">And
what about afterwards?’</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
The Major's question was almost conversational.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">How
do you mean, sir?' I said.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
mean,’ said the Major, leaning forward, his tone sharper, ‘what
happened after you went wandering off by yourself and finished up at
this cosy little party in a terrorist village?’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
answered slowly and deliberately, looking at him across the empty
desk. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">It
was not a party, sir, and I had no reason to think the old man I met
was a terrorist.’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'No
reason, Corporal? Every bloody village in that area is a hotbed of
terrorists. The hills are full of them. There's probably an arms
stash in every village.'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'I
didn't realise that, sir. I file all the reports and none of them
have mentioned arms caches being found in that area.'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Don't
be bloody impertinent, Corporal. </span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Stand
up! Stand to attention!’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
stood up, brought my left boot smartly against my right, heels
together, and stared straight ahead. I knew what was coming – it
was a standard </span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">interrogation
technique.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Start
again!</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Tell
me again, from the beginning.’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">For
the second time I told the same story. I said our platoon had decided
on a day out, a beach party in a great little cove we’d seen while
out on patrol. There had been no terrorist activity for months,
regulations were relaxed and we didn’t need to carry weapons.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
said I’d got bored with snorkelling and drinking and sunbathing so
I decided to go walking in the hills above the coast road. I said I
realized now that it had been unwise, even in the current situation.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
had no map on this spur-of-the-moment trek and I soon got lost as
even the goat tracks dwindled and disappeared. I was relieved
eventually to come across a small cultivated field. At the far side a
donkey stood motionless among olive trees and an old man sat on a low
stone wall. As I came into the shade he looked up and raised his hand
in greeting. He showed no surprise at my khaki shorts and Army boots.</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
No sense of hostility or alarm, either.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Kalispera</i></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">,’
I said (‘Good afternoon’). It seemed more appropriate here than
the more familiar ‘</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Yassou</i></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">’
we heard in town.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Though
he was smoking a pipe, I thought it polite to offer him a cigarette.
Equally polite, he put aside his pipe and took it. I watched as he
flicked the wheel of an old-fashioned lighter. His hands were brown
and bone-hard as the land they worked, the hands of generations past.
They were like my grandfather’s hands, like my father’s hands,
like mine would have been if I'd stayed on the farm.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">He
had no English and I had only a few words of Greek, but we managed to
exchange names and simple pleasantries. He scratched his name on a
stone for me - Petros. I could read most of the Cyrillic alphabet.
Only later did I think it might have been the only word he could
write.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">He
was seventy two years old and this was his family field. He had lived
in the nearby village all his life. He had three children and eight
grandchildren. Somehow</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>
</i></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
got him to understand that my family also worked on the land. When I
mimed heat and sweating, he indicated he had finished work for the
day and would take me home and we could have a drink together.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">That
was what I told the Major.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The
one street was almost deserted in the early afternoon heat. Two
little boys stood open-mouthed then ran into their house. I followed
Petros out of the bright sunshine and stepped down into the cool
darkness of a doorway – and stopped. I stood absolutely still, my
heart thumping.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">It
was that unmistakeable sound, the solid clunk, the big breech-block
of a Sten pulled back ready to fire.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Stavro!’
The old man’s voice was like a whiplash.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
could see the young man now, and the sub machine gun aimed at me.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">He
was protesting, shouting, gesturing toward me. The old man stood
firm, spoke quietly. He turned his back on the young man and pulled
out a chair. I sat down. Stavros stood for a full minute, but finally
sat on the chair opposite me. His eyes never left my face; the Sten
gun was still in his hands</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Petros
called out and soon an old woman came through from the other room
with a tray of food and coffee. The cups rattled as the tray shook in
her hands. She said nothing. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">There
were three cups. Stavros was ready to refuse but a look from the old
man stopped him. He put the gun on the table before he sat down. The
muzzle was pointing at me. The old man leaned across and turned it
towards a blank wall. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">We
ate and drank almost in silence. My vocabulary was running out fast.
</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>‘Efharisto</i></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">’,
I said more than once (‘Thank you’). Then Petros spoke to the
young man who turned to me and spoke in English.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">You
are my enemy. You are in my country. We want you out, gone, finish.
But my Uncle Petros say I cannot kill you because you are in his
house and we eat and drink together. I say you will bring soldiers
here to find me. He say you will not. What do you say? Will you bring
soldiers here?’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
turned to the old man and used my last word of Greek – ‘</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Oxi’
</i></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">(‘No’)
and on an impulse held out my hand. He grasped it and nodded. It was
enough. We had made a bargain.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Petros
spoke to the young man again and this brought another torrent of
protest. But the old man’s quiet certainty wore him down. At last
he spoke, resigned to the task.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">My
uncle is tired. He is finish work today. He say I must take you to
the road.’ </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">His
voice was strained. He cleared his throat. For a second I thought he
was going to spit in my face. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">For
my uncle, I will take you to the road,’ he said, ‘but I see you
again, I kill you!’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">That
wasn’t good enough for Uncle Petros. He sensed what was being said.
When Stavros spoke again, he was like a child, having to repeat word
for word what the old man had said.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">My
uncle say this. You are a young man. Stavros is a young man. I am
old. I am finish with fighting. I say you do not fight today. Another
day, is for God to say.’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Petros
made the sign of the cross and waited till Stavros did the same.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The
old man watched us set off, back towards the field where I first met
him. As soon as we were away from the village, Stavros motioned for
me to walk ahead. He still had the loaded Sten under his arm, his
finger on the trigger guard.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">My
senses sharpened the further we went from the village. I trusted
Petros; could I trust this hothead? He was no more than ten yards
behind me. My ears were alive to the sound of his footsteps, and
listening for that chilling metallic clunk I’d heard in the
darkness of his uncle’s house. My eyes ranged ahead, seeking out
every fold in the ground, every boulder, any possible cover. I noted
every stick, every stone, any weapon.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
missed a step and stumbled. Stavros shouted, 'I watching you. Stay on
this path.</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'
S</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-style: normal;">weat
was running down my spine. My shoulders ached with the tension, aware
of a gun was ten yards behind me, ready to pump bullets into my back </span></span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Apart
from that one shout, he said nothing. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">My
stomach muscles cramped briefly when he finally spoke again</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">.
</span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Stop!’</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
stood and waited, looking straight ahead. </span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">He
came closer.</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
He moved sideways off the path, standing where I could see him, about
six feet away. The Sten's muzzle was pointing at my chest. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">You
take this path, you find Varosha road.’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">His
face was blank. I don’t know what I expected to find in his eyes.
We had no point of contact except one – our respect for the old
man. </span></span>
</div>
<div align="LEFT" class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">So
I told the Major, for the third time, about getting lost, about
meeting the old man, going to his house, accepting his hospitality. I
made no mention of Stavros, the gun, the arguments in the house, or
my pact with Petros. I knew it was my duty to report all that, but I
didn’t. I had given my word.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
was on the brink of promotion to sergeant. Depending on the Major’s
report at the year end, that promotion might have to wait.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">If
I identified the village, if I named Stavros, he would be hunted. It
was very unlikely he could be found - so many similar names, so many
bewildering family connections. What was certain was that 72-year-old
Petros, as the only identifiable family member, would be taken in and
questioned. Other members of his family would in turn be found,
questioned, held – for how long? What would it be like for them?
I'd rounded up suspects in the past but never been involved in the
interrogation. You heard </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">things
sometimes, things done by soldiers who had lost mates, friends who
were like brothers, killed or maimed by roadside bombs or ambushes.
The treatment of suspects was not always strictly by the book.</span></span></div>
<div align="LEFT" class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Our
company surrounded the village two days later. The Major had decided
to carry out a “shut down and search” operation; they were often
done on the flimsiest of evidence or none at all. The young rookies
got the idea they were doing something useful, instead of sitting
around in a dusty camp, polishing their boots. The old sweats knew
it was almost certainly pointless.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">It
was like a dozen similar operations. You got whispers, rumours,
possible sightings of wanted men. When you moved in, no one had seen
them, nobody knew them. If they were ever there, they had melted
away. They would have known more tracks out of that village than the
ways we knew to come in.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The
search took an hour. There were not many places to search. Nothing
was found. </span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">All
the village males were rounded up and held in the little square by
the church. I saw Petros among them. The Major ordered the older men
separated from the rest.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
‘<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Corporal!
Stand here beside me. Point out the man called Petros.’</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
don’t think I can, sir. Maybe he’s not here.'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">You
bloody idiot!' He was losing it. 'Are you sure we’re even in the
right place?'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">He
didn’t notice my stifled sigh of relief. This was my way out.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">All
these villages look pretty much the same, sir. Remember I was totally
lost at the time. I think the church I saw might have been a little
smaller.'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The
Major had one last try. He got the police interpreter to call out
'Petros, step forward!'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm; orphans: 2; text-indent: -0.2cm; widows: 2;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Three
old men and four of the younger ones stepped out of their groups,
followed by a little boy, who saluted, left-handed. It wasn’t quite
the “I am Spartacus!” scene, but I caught a sly twitch on the
lips of one or two squaddies.</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Get
those young ones back in line!' shouted the Major. 'Have a good look
at these three, Corporal. Is he here?'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I
moved in closer, then turned to the Major. '</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">There’s
no one here I can identify, sir.'</span></span></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">'</span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Another
bloody wild goose chase! Sergeant Major, get the men together and
let's get out of here.' </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Every
Petros had smiled at me as I walked up to each one in turn. “My”
Petros had a smile no different from the others. Only I could see,
close up, the calm acceptance in his eyes. There was no fear. </span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-style: normal;">He</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
trusted me. I had kept my bargain. </span></span>
</div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="western" style="line-height: 100%; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "liberation" serif , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><i>(2,030
words)</i></span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-65624467373952764542017-04-24T01:34:00.001-07:002017-04-24T01:34:40.539-07:00<h2>
This blog is now defunct, not going anywhere, has breathed its last, dropped off the twig and gone to join the choir invisible. </h2>
<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>After its leap up to around 300 in the daily pageview charts in mid-November and through till March, it has slumped into single figures, so is clearly not worth continuing. </i></span></h3>
<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>I now leave it undisturbed to concentrate on finishing my novel, initially inspired by the Bonfiglioli himself and now into its 29th chapter with the final five or six already planned.</i></span></h3>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-87022439977506212532017-04-15T15:13:00.001-07:002017-04-15T15:13:45.883-07:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">Let's get back to humo</span></i></span><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">rous verse. I could do with a good laugh. Perhaps my readers in USA could do with one too. Where have you all disappeared to, guys?</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;">The
Magnificent Attenboroughs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">That
chap David Attenborough <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Is
inordinately thorough <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">When
searching out new species. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">
He studies everything <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">From
the colour of their skin <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">To
the individual texture of their faeces. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Now
Dickie, on the other hand, he <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Made
the film entitled “Gandhi”, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">That
architect of India’s freedom. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Although
a man of fame and note, he’s <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Remembered
most for skinny legs <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">And
freshly-laundered dhotis. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">That’s
Gandhi, by the way, not Dickie; <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Wearing
loincloths would be tricky <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">In
“Rillington” or Kringle’s fable, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Okay
in “Great Escape”, perhaps, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">But
not for pukka English chaps <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">Who’d
find it most un-pal-a-table.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">In
science fact and filmic fiction, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">These
brothers shone with rare conviction. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">On
movies and on TV screen,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">So
hard, you say, to choose between.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">You’d
vote for Dick or Dave, alright. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">But
which one is your favou-rite?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-35058379708954452782017-04-07T01:36:00.000-07:002017-04-07T01:36:03.524-07:00<h3>
<i>Here's my third place winner (if that's not a contradiction in terms) for Flash Fiction at the Scottish Association of Writers annual conference. </i></h3>
<h3>
<i>I was about to give up on this blog when the pageviews slumped from about 300 a day to single figures and tens. But there was a welcome spike of 64 at 10 am on Wednesday (thank you, Japan), so I am encouraged to to carry on.</i></h3>
<h3>
<i><b>Now if I can just find a tasteful illustration of a skull on Pinterest - or a bonfire with dark overtones of impending doom . . .</b></i></h3>
<br />
<br />
<div style="border-bottom: solid #2DA2BF 1.0pt; border: none; mso-element: para-border-div; padding: 0in 0in 4.0pt 0in;">
<div class="MsoTitle">
<b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;">In
Sure and Certain Hope</span></b><b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> </span><img src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/7a/99/d5/7a99d5fc1868048debc73d591dada2f5.jpg" style="background-color: white; background-size: contain; border-radius: 8px; border: 0px; color: #211922; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, "ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3", "Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro", メイリオ, Meiryo, "MS Pゴシック", arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; height: auto; margin-left: 17px; margin-top: 100px; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle; width: 204px;" /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 32px; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 32px;">He came in from the back garden sweating, though </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 32px;">the night was cold. Walking on the newspapers, h</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 32px;">e peeled off his overalls and gloves and all his </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">clothes and placed them neatly in the middle of the </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">papers, muddy shoes on top. She’d had a
thing </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">about keeping the kitchen clean.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> The dog cowered down in its basket,
trembling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> After a thorough shower, he came back and
knelt </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">to bundle up the papers and the clothes.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">
</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">There </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">would be a load of rubbish to burn tomorrow. </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">The huge pile of fallen leaves and old
cuttings at the bottom of the garden was covered with a tarpaulin to keep it
dry.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;">She’d had plenty to say about
that.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Funny, she didn’t say much about the text
from Denise, the one confirming the flight time and the hotel booking. Just shoved the phone in front of him and
walked away with her face shut tight. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> A shoe had fallen off the pile. But he’d placed them so carefully. No mistakes now. He checked the clothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> One blood-stained glove was missing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Cold air came in from the garden. That bloody door! Never did close properly. He looked around . Jack wasn’t in his
basket. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> ‘Oh, Christ, he’s got the glove! He’s going to bury it. I’ll kill the yapping little bastard.’ <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> He was still in the garden, naked, digging
frantically along the borders, shouting ‘Jack!
Come here, Jack!’ when frightened neighbours dialled 999.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-24714213131825687392017-03-31T07:12:00.000-07:002017-03-31T07:12:35.699-07:00<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Another piece of flash fiction from my files</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<img alt="Pin preview" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/cd/ad/6d/cdad6dc874646d5503ff51a621929ae7.jpg" style="background-color: white; border-radius: 6px; border: 0px; color: #211922; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, "ヒラギノ角ゴ Pro W3", "Hiragino Kaku Gothic Pro", メイリオ, Meiryo, "MS Pゴシック", arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; height: auto; max-height: 85%; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: middle;" /> <br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="font-size: xx-large;">Leave 'er!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Mick was getting impatient. Why
was Robbo standing there like a plank, looking at the bundle on the ground?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">She</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s 'alf dead,</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> can</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t yuh see? Fuckin</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> leave </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">er, mate.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Robbo made no move. The globes on the park gates lit the scar on
the side of his face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> ‘She’s nothin’ to you,’ said
Mick. ‘Just some old tart.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Robbo said nothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Look, if we</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">re still </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ere an</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> someone comes.
they</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ll think we fuckin</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> done it.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Robbo turned his head. Mick had seen that look many times, in gang
fights, in police cells, in the underpass where the two of them, empty handed,
had faced the Mullen brothers and their baseball bats.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">You don</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t fuckin</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> tell me what to do. You can piss off. I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">m stayin</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">, alright?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> The bundle of clothes moved
slightly. A whimper escaped from her
tortured throat. Mick spat and moved
away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">m out of </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ere.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Go, then! Go on, get aht of it!</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Robbo knelt
beside the woman and took hold of her bloodied hand. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> She was middle-aged and
chubby, wearing heels and a skirt that was too short, for her and for this
weather. She</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">d been badly beaten.
In the dim light, her frightened eyes looked for his.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">m here, okay? I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’ll</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> stay with
you. No one</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s gonna hurt you any more.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> He felt a
movement in the hand he was holding. ‘Can
you hear me? No one</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s gonna hurt you any more.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> He felt for his phone. He</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">d never called 999
before.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Robert was 12 years old again, holding his sister</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s hand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I won</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t leave you.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> He heard his
father</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s step on the stairs, heard
the belt buckle being loosened. </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I won</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t run away this
time. I won’t.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Robbo was still sitting there, cradling the woman</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s head, talking to her, when the ambulance lights
turned in at the park gates and came bouncing over the grass towards them. A police car followed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> He didn</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t move. Didn</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t struggle when they cuffed his hands behind his back
and shoved him into the car. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> The sergeant sitting in the
front seat turned and glared at him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> ‘What did you say, scum-bag?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Robbo said it again, almost to himself, ‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I didn</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t run away this time.</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-73650403189091895782017-03-27T14:41:00.003-07:002017-04-01T02:00:02.240-07:00<br />
<h3>
<i>Here's a double helping of fantasy, a 1600 word story, from the guy who didn't think he could write fantasy. I suppose mine is too rooted in reality to be out and out fantasy - no swords, sandals or mythical beasts. Still, I hope you enjoy it.</i></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 20.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Looking Back<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">I first noticed the difference in Tuesday</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s English lesson with 4B. I suppose most teachers can manage the usual
trick.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> You know the one. Facing the
blackboard, you might say, </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Don</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t go to sleep yet, Hutchings. Wait till the lesson</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s finished.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> or (utterly
reckless of your professional career) </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">If you don</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t stay in your seat, young Potts, I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ll glue your disgusting trousers to it.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> It</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s a combination of your knowledge of the usual class suspects
and an ear attuned to every sound in the room, from creaking floorboards to the
rustle of paper aeroplanes. Snoring of course is a dead giveaway.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> That Tuesday afternoon I
surprised myself. Terry Turnbull was dumbfounded.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">That won</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t fly, Turnbull. A Muller
corner lid lacks the structural integrity for unpowered flight.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> I turned to face the class
and an open-mouthed Turnbull - and immediately noticed a minor mistake I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">d just written on the blackboard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘After you’ve shut your mouth, y</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ou can come out
here and cross the final T in </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">tarts</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">”</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">. And I shall be watching you. Don</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t even think about adding anything to the first one.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> <span lang="EN-US">A couple of seconds went by till they made the
connection, then the whole class erupted with laughter.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> The bell sounded soon after.
The class filed out, still talking about my supernatural powers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Driving home, it was very
disconcerting at first not to have to check the mirror to see the traffic
behind me. But already I was beginning to fantasize about how I might be able
to use this new power.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> At home, I asked, </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Darling, can you see anything different about the back
of my head? . . . Look closer, then. Anything at all?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Sylvie carefully ran her
fingers through my hair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">What</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s that?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> she shrieked. </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Oh, my God, what is
it?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> She slapped my arm, quite
hard. </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">You</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ve been to that joke shop again, haven</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t you?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">No, love. It just happened this morning. I don</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">t know what it is. What does it look like?</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">It</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">s an eye - a bloody
eye! It was looking at me.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Yes, I saw you. You <i>did</i> look surprised.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Of course I was surprised!</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> <span lang="EN-US">She sat down suddenly on the nearest chair and started
to sob. </span></span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">You</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ll have to see the doctor. I’ll phone Jim</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> </span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">‘</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Oh, no,</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> I said. ‘I</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ve seen those flying saucer abduction movies. No, we</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">ve got to keep this quiet.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">’ I patted her shoulder while I looked around for a
pen and paper. ‘Let’s think about it,
Sylvie. This could open up possibilities we’ve never dreamed of. Now if I were a football referee, or a store
detective . . hm . . wonder if MI5 could use me? Is it something I could teach
others to develop? Start an Academy of the Super Senses?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> Sylvia’s sobbing got louder.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> ‘Could you be quiet a minute,
love? I’m thinking.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"> She rushed off into the
kitchen. A bit early, I thought, to start the dinner. Has she got something
special to prepare? It’s not an anniversary or something, is it? I’m not very
good at remembering them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> A thought suddenly occurred to me. Why
hadn’t I thought of it before? How did I manage to see through my hair. It’s
not short at the back. Sylvia hadn’t noticed anything odd till she parted it.
No, not odd. Unusual, yes, Special, even. Special. It’s special.
I’m special.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> The point is, how could I manage to see so
clearly - even that uncrossed “t” on the blackboard - if my special vision was
obscured by hair?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> The thoughts were coming thick and fast
now. Next thing I found myself in the hallway, calling out excitedly to Sylvia,
‘Just had an idea, love. Nothing for you to worry about!’ I resisted the
temptation to use the phrase “pretty little head”; I learned that lesson a long
time ago.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I grabbed one of my trilbies off the
hatstand. Sylvia was always at me to get rid of them. ‘Nobody your age wears a
hat like that now. It makes you look ten years older.’ She worries about things
like that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> First, I closed my front eyes - as I had
already come to think of them.
Immediately the world went dark.
So, my special vision was somehow connected to them. Just as well, otherwise sleep would be a real
problem. Carefully I put the hat on and
lowered it over where I judged the special one to be, took a deep breath and
opened my eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I could see clearly everything behind me.
Wow! How far coulod this go?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Pots and pans were clattering in the
kitchen, as if Sylvia was searching for something. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I
wondered, could I? Is it possible? If I
can see through a hat, could I see through a wall?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I turned so that my back was toward the
kitchen. Nothing at first. I concentrated, willing myself to see, trying
to become aware of the focus of the eye, extending that focus further and
further, till suddenly . . .<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I could see Sylvia in the kitchen. I could actually see her, through the wall,
clear as anything. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> She was standing at the open door of the
‘odds and ends’ cupboard, where she kept the utensils that she hardly ever
used. I could see that she was holding the cast iron frying pan my mother had
given her some years ago. It was part of a gift set for her birthday. Can’t
think why she’d looked that out. She had always resented it; called it a
reflection on her cooking skills. Personally, I thought it was nice of Mother
to try to help, always coming round with recipes for the dishes I used to like
when I was at home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I was getting really excited now about
this new-found skill, attribute, whatever you like to call it. What could I do
with it? What could I not do with it? I needed to experiment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Just going out, love. Don’t bother about
cooking anything special; I’m too excited to eat much, anyway. I’ve got to test this new skill, find out all
the things I can do with it.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I was on one knee in the hallway, putting
a shoe on, when I saw Sylvia coming out of the kitchen behind me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘No need to come with me, dear. You won’t
be able to help. Just stay at home and get on with your wifey things.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I saw the heavy pan coming towards the
back of my head, felt the wind of its swing, but I couldn’t do a thing about
it, kneeling there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> A blinding pain in my head, flashes of
light. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> When I came round, much later, I was in a
bed at the Royal Infirmary, head
bandaged and tongue babbling. They told me later that I’d been singing,
‘Remember you’re a Womble’ over and over. People do funny things under anaesthetic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Our GP was there, Jim Harrison. We’ve
known him since schooldays. Sylvia was there, crying again. It’s an annoying
habit. I’ve told her many times. The consultant was there. And the policeman.
Forgot about him, sitting there taking notes. I wonder how many pages he
had of ‘Remember you’re a Womble’. He was very young.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Jim was on his feet and quickly came
across to me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Hallo, David, good to see you awake. How
much do you remember?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Of course, I remembered everything. I
pride myself on my good memory - well, except for birthdays, anniversaries,
stuff like that. But I hesitated. I could see the warning in his eyes. I could
see my little Sylvie, still shaking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘No, not much,” I said. ‘Did I . . . have
a fall?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘We’re not sure, David. Sylvia was a bit
confused when she rang 999. Then she rang me afterwards.’ Jim gave me a look
that said, plain as anything, just as well she did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> The young policeman got to his feet.
‘Excuse me, doctor. I have to check.’
Then to me, ‘Are you sure, sir, there’s nothing more you can remember?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Yes, there is.’ The room waited.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘For some reason,’ I said, ’I think I was
carrying a frying pan at the time.’ <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> He seemed to be satisfied. Sylvia gave me
a trembling smile from across the room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> Then it was the consultant’s turn. She
told me I’d been taken straight to A&E and operated on. There was now a
metal plate in the back of my head. She said they’d had a real mess to clear
up, including what appeared to be a growth. Had I noticed anything there? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘No,’ I said, ‘What sort of growth?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Nothing to worry about,’ she said, ‘We
did a biopsy. It wasn’t malignant.
Anyway, it’s all gone now. You don’t need to worry about it.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘But could you identify it? I mean what
sort of…?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Just a growth. Just tissue. Nothing to
worry about. Really.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> All that was some weeks ago. Sylvia and I
are picking up the pieces, as they say. She’s out of hospital, too. The other
hospital, if you know what I mean. I’m on beta blockers for my blood pressure
and on extended leave from school, and she’s on vallium again. The psychologist
said we should take a break, get away from it all for a while. Bournemouth is
still quite warm in September.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> There was one thing I didn’t tell him.
Perhaps because I’ve now lost that special extra sense, as it were, another
sense has become more acute. I feel it now, as I put my hands behind my head
and settle back on the deck-chair, and the murmur of the waves a few yards away
grows louder.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"> Perhaps I ought to check up on this
strange little growth in my left armpit, like a ring of cartilage. I’ll see Jim
when we get home. I won’t mention it to Sylvia, though. It might be a bit much for her</span>.</span></h3>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-55203976300329513782017-03-12T16:36:00.001-07:002017-03-16T10:13:18.122-07:00<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>An episode from my ultra-pure youth.</i></span></h3>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>The One that Got Away</b></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">She was sitting on one of those uncomfortable iron slatted benches that used to be anchored on concrete bases in our parks. This one faced a deserted playing field beside the County Education Centre.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> I was strolling round the edge of the field. It was a warm summer evening in my last term at the Grammar School. She and I were part of a gathering of some fif</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">ty pupils from a number of schools in the South Bucks area. From Friday to Sunday we were expected to converse, sing, read, make jokes and declaim poetry entirely in French. In its way it was the definitive "le weekend". The Academie Francaise may have hated that adulterative phrase and its recent intrusion into the purity of their beloved language but they would surely have approved of the idea: English boys and girls spending a whole weekend being as near French as possible.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> I was usually shy around girls, even at seventeen. I'd been at an all-boys school since I was eleven; my pastimes were either solitary reading or the obligatory "healthy outdoor pursuits"; and my female cousins lived too far away to allow social forgathering or covert exploration. </span><span style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;"> But Frenchness</span><span style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;"> it seems works on other levels than language.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Judy was small and slight with short, very blond hair. She would not be called pretty but she had an air of calm self-possession that immediately attracted me.She had two books on the bench beside her and one open on her lap. She looked up as I approached. She didn't smile a welcome but neither did she look away.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> I forget what I said to open the conversation but it was almost certainly a question about what she was reading. It was not in French. Mock horror from me; a half smile from her. Perhaps, I suggested, this was why she was sitting alone, out of sight of inquisitive teachers. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Within seconds we discovered a shared passion for the Romantic poets. We chatted, we smiled, we finished each other's quotes from Shelley, Keats, Byron, Browning and his Elizabeth. We even dipped into Rimbaud and Baudelaire. We delighted in our shared enthusiasm.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> The light was fading. I don't remember if any others strolled by; we might not have noticed if they had.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Someone had to break up our joyous tete-a-tete. Two seventeen-year-olds of opposite sexes sitting together in the gathering dusk of a summer evening could not be allowed. In 1952 the parameters of moral turpitude were clearly defined.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> 'Come on now, you two. Inside with you. The dance will be starting soon.' </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Our joint protests, even in untidy French, fell on deaf ears.<i>'Oh, Mamselle. Nous n'aimons pas la danse. Est-ce que possible que nous restons ici? Nous lisons les poemes </i>Francaises<i>. </i>It's <i>French</i> poetry we're reading.' (hastily shoving aside the Shelley and bringing out the Baudelaire.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Weekends like this always finished with a dance. It was a good excuse to keep all the hormones - raging, simmering or apparently dormant - herded together in one place under the vigilant eyes of chaperoning schoolmasters and mistresses. No matter that Mr H.C. (Harry) Todd, our Francophile English teacher, had whisked Miss Elizabeth Thompson (History) off to France last summer in the sidecar of his motorbike - a cause of much lurid speculation in the upper forms . </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> We went into the hall. </span><span style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;">Judy disappeared either into the crowd or to her dormitory.</span><span style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I can't remember if I enjoyed the dance or even if I danced at all. </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I never saw her again.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Our brief meeting is sweet in my memory.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-26312501940953335792017-02-26T16:17:00.000-08:002017-03-04T01:33:19.166-08:00<br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i>Last week I promised I would post an article about tai chi chuan, which as you will discover, is one of my passions. The promise was to the daughter of an old friend. She was one of my earliest tai chi students and her daughter remembers as a child trying to copy her mother's movements when she practised at home. That indicates how long I have been teaching.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i> It also shows that the circle keeps turning, that all our actions have consequences, that the yin and yang, the symbol of tai chi, is more than a symbol. It is a part of life. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i> Tai chi is a big part of my life.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;">Finding
Stillness in Movement</span></b><br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwOyz3rJDFSm5TIOeTOzlF38F5NwnjDqNHVGphp3r20EVcHbE3mF_skaU2smW4W8gxx42YlO0pNz_CAo2PicTFQgyH-mkP7di_hUtBv_Fxn1gPUaiQVIYx1ilAkWelVqzxDnFqlqgiv3nN/s1600/Sabre+poser.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwOyz3rJDFSm5TIOeTOzlF38F5NwnjDqNHVGphp3r20EVcHbE3mF_skaU2smW4W8gxx42YlO0pNz_CAo2PicTFQgyH-mkP7di_hUtBv_Fxn1gPUaiQVIYx1ilAkWelVqzxDnFqlqgiv3nN/s320/Sabre+poser.jpg" width="208" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />A posture from the sabre form.<br />That's "posture", not "poser".</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">At a sports hall on the outskirts of Aberdeen </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">every Wednesday evening, you will see </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">people gathering for what might be an </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">exercise class, or possibly an indoor games </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">evening. Some carry six-foot poles; some </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">have long bags designed for hockey sticks; </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">others only a water bottle and soft flat shoes. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">But somehow you know that not one has a </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">sweatband or a lycra leotard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> These people practise the Chinese art of </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">tai chi chuan, sometimes rendered in our </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">alphabet as taijiquan (but pronounced </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">exactly like neither). Its slow, graceful, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">spiralling movements help them to achieve </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">flexibility, co-ordination and a composure </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">that stills the mind and balances the body. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">It loosens their joints and stretches their </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">muscles rather than tightening them; it puts </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;">health before fitness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Tai chi chuan is usually translated as “supreme ultimate fist” and, for all its slowness in practice, is an authentic and effective martial art. You may be relieved, or possibly disappointed to learn that this class we speak of doesn’t include any fighting. Very few do. But the hockey bags open to reveal practice swords and the long poles are swung and aimed in pre-set patterns of spear-thrust and parry.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Many will have heard of tai chi but few know its depth and potential. The clue is in the name. “Tai chi” is not the whole story. That term describes the Taoist principle or philosophy on which the art of tai chi chuan is based. Among other things, Taoist thought embraces the concept of “yin and yang” – the opposing yet complementary forces that have shaped and continue to shape the world. These forces are constantly changing, growing and diminishing in turn, since each contains within itself the seed of its opposite – the black dot in the white half of the circle, the white in the black.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Tai chi chuan expresses that concept in movement. Thus there is constant change from back to forward, left to right, from yielding to countering. The movements have a gentle elastic quality; within every backward movement there is an opportunity to go forward.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Too many people see only the graceful and apparently effortless movement of this art. So they think it is no more than waving your arms about in some mystical way in order to become “at one with the cosmos”. Unfortunately some teachers pander to this notion and foster an atmosphere of mystery and magic. Self-delusion is a powerful thing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> True to the Oriental delight in paradox, it is often said that the practice is simple but not easy. Like anything else that’s worthwhile, tai chi chuan demands your full attention and commitment before it will yield up its enormous benefits. It is not a quick fix or a flavour-of-the-month.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> As you practise this art, you experience examples of paradox. Imagine for instance a system of fighting that can be used to heal; visualize slow, relaxed exercises that can develop tremendous whole-body power. You are discovering the stillness in movement.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Some who practise this art are in denial over its martial lineage; a few teachers have renamed the movements. Kick with the Heel becomes Release; Parry and Punch is rendered as Open and Drive. This may be understandable on the basis that sensible, civilised people do not seek to get involved in physical confrontations. On the other hand it is unforgiveable because they deny their students the chance to appreciate the whole picture. If you aren’t told how the movements originated or how they were designed to be used, even those with such poetic names as Parting the Wild Horse’s Mane or White Crane Spreads its Wings, then the movements lose their focus and intent. This does not mean you have to fight. You don’t need to throw someone to the ground to feel within your body the beauty of a slow, turning, sinking Step Back to Beat the Tiger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> The proper study of any martial art teaches us to avoid violence. I venture to suggest that any youngsters studying martial arts under responsible teachers are not the among the thugs infesting our streets and invading our lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> Movement without purpose, however graceful, is just beautiful empty movement. When movement has focus and purpose, it comes alive. Consider ballet, consider athletics – any sport. Torvill and Dean’s “Bolero” tells a story; Sebastian Coe’s home-straight sprint, a surge of power from such a slight frame, wins the race. Purpose, focus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> The standard image from TV and magazines of old Chinese folk moving slowly in the morning mist in a Beijing park is only part of the story. In my class there are indeed many pensioners. (I started in 1987 at 53 – work it out.) But there are also a couple of students and two university lecturers, a builder, a young woman expecting her first child, a chimney-sweep and a physiotherapist. What they have in common is the maturity to mix serious study with a light-hearted approach to the life-changing influence of tai chi chuan.</span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwOyz3rJDFSm5TIOeTOzlF38F5NwnjDqNHVGphp3r20EVcHbE3mF_skaU2smW4W8gxx42YlO0pNz_CAo2PicTFQgyH-mkP7di_hUtBv_Fxn1gPUaiQVIYx1ilAkWelVqzxDnFqlqgiv3nN/s1600/Sabre+poser.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-81476295628391336352017-02-25T04:52:00.000-08:002017-02-25T08:03:25.880-08:00Rediscovering Bonfig<h4>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>An apology (I seem to have been apologising a lot on this blog): I was busy on the early postings (2013, would you believe?) uploading photographs that had mysteriously disappeared (see below). I surprised myself by succeeding. </i></span></h4>
<div>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>On this post, unfortunately, not only did I bring the photo to life once again, but the post itself time-travelled four years into the future and reappeared as today's post.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I hope it hasn't confused too many people.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-weight: normal;">I also managed, after all these years, to change my Location in the panel on the right from USA to UK. I have not been able to change from Pacific Standard Time to Greenwich Mean Time. Will this mean I'll lose my American readers/viewers/visitors? I hope not; they have boosted my pageview numbers recently to what for me were gigantic proportions. It was </i><b>not</b><i><b> </b>a deliberate ploy to increase readership - honest!</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<i>Another thing, while I'm on about numbers. My pageview numbers took a huge drop on Monday 20th of this month (February). After being consistently around the 300 a day mark, they dropped to under 100 but recovered the next day. Was there a Rip van Winkle effect? Did America go to sleep for most of the day? </i><i>Did Donald Trump's executive order on immigration apply to alien blogs as well?</i></div>
<div>
<i> </i></div>
<div>
<i> Anyway, because I haven't yet found a way to beam the post back to where it belongs in the past, I'll leave this time-warped piece of history to keep you occupied till tomorrow, when I'll post an article on tai chi chuan which has been my passion for the last almost thirty years.</i></div>
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Welcome</span></h2>
to my first ever blog - both of you. Let's hope we have more company soon.<br />
<br />
I shall guess that at least one of you has read and been delighted by the novels of the man of the title, my late friend and former colleague, Kyril Emmanuel Georg Karl Bonfiglioli - novelist, wit and knife-thrower. The other of you, whether curious or just lost in the labyrinth of the internet, can prepare to be enlightened. <em> </em>I hope you'll both be amused and entertained.<br />
<br />
<strong> Because my memories of Bonfig (for whom the phrase "colourful character" might have been invented) are too worthy of a good telling to be condensed into one post, too rich a banquet to be savoured at a sitting, I shall serve them up as weekly dishes. Your comments can provide the seasoning of your choice.</strong><br />
<strong></strong><br />
<strong> If you've read his books, I dare to hope that you may find a faint echo of his writing style in mine. There, I've admitted my presumptuous ambition. I shall now be at the mercy of every Bonfiglioli aficionado, literary troll and online heckler.</strong><br />
<strong></strong><br />
When I first googled his extraordinary name upon a whim and a startled keyboard, I expected to find no more than half a dozen entries, maybe a few Amazon special offers on his novels (he'd written three and most of a fourth) and possibly something about his remarkable knowledge of heraldry.<br />
<br />
I did not expect page after page of biography, bibliography and plauditry that approached cult status, with praise from literary lights and entertainment greats (Stephen Fry, Susan Hill, Craig Brown and Miles Kington, to name those I care to remember). There were pieces glowing with praise from the New Yorker and the Independent, not to mention the TLS. The various articles and mini-biographies seemed to cover most of his life till he died in 1985.<br />
<br />
<strong> Most but not all. This personal memoir is written to fill that gap.</strong><br />
<br />
Though his Army service in West Africa was listed, there was no mention of his time as an Education Sergeant at the Gordon Highlanders Depot in Aberdeen. That is where he and I first met in the summer of '54.<br />
<br />
I had the same three stripes, though I was junior to him in every respect. He taught me knife-throwing, fencing and how to fry peas in Worcester sauce. In the few months that I knew him, the man had an influence on me which has lasted to this day - to say nothing of bringing my university career to a full stop before it even began.<br />
<br />
Rediscovering Bonfig after he had died only made me want to know more. I tracked down his second wife Margaret, author of <em>The Mortdecai ABC,</em> an invaluable and insightful volume of Bonfigliana that takes its name from his supposed alter ego and the anti-hero of his novels, the Hon Charlie Mortdecai. I was delighted to receive an encouraging reply, urging me to go ahead with this bundle of reminiscences. Her support has even extended to forgiveness for the parody of her title and the flagrant theft of her format.<br />
<br />
Accordingly I call it<br />
<br />
<div align="center">
<strong><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Bonfiglioli ABC </span></strong><em>(to be continued)</em></div>
<div align="center">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisdboGCyMWf-GAMq4S85Hlw6YnSjaJ0UgFqMVSex62GUE_ysbULgtGb9bmtqKontdI1s9l9wb10kwBVvOugi3DSQC9ss4ha2Hxhjp3NLrfZh43bLlfu9fbWUaQuXdu16JQw0A9sBZGiAqM/s1600/Bon+H%2526S.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisdboGCyMWf-GAMq4S85Hlw6YnSjaJ0UgFqMVSex62GUE_ysbULgtGb9bmtqKontdI1s9l9wb10kwBVvOugi3DSQC9ss4ha2Hxhjp3NLrfZh43bLlfu9fbWUaQuXdu16JQw0A9sBZGiAqM/s1600/Bon+H%2526S.jpg" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i>
<i>Kyril Bonfiglioli, Summer 1954</i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0United Kingdom54.977613670696257 -2.812522.553398670696261 -85.4296875 87.401828670696261 79.8046875tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-80638453451132365032017-02-19T12:03:00.004-08:002017-02-19T12:03:34.529-08:00<br />
<i style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Sarina was not her name; she used it when she was in a trance or "channelling".</i><br />
<i style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br /></i>
<i style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br /></i>
<b style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: xx-large;">Past Portrait</b><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt;">The portrait she planned was
the face of a queen;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt;">the painting emerged as a
bearded young man,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">someone
imagined, whom she’d never seen, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">a
face from the past, from a far foreign land. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Painted
in earth colours, russet and gold, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">the
most striking feature the mound of dark hair, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">bushy
and full with a queue as of old, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">it
looked like a head-dress, exotic and rare.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Sarina
once told me she painted this picture<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">almost
in trance, as if being led.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Hardly
aware of the brush in her hand, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">she
brought to existence a being long dead.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">She
called it “Bartholomew”, felt that the name <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">was
right for the man who appeared on the page.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Never
knew an apostle was called by the same.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Was
this a link with that Biblical age?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-21436879060149375362017-02-13T01:19:00.000-08:002017-02-13T02:44:12.481-08:00<h1>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></h1>
<h2>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><i style="font-weight: normal;">A dark poem for dark February days:</i></span></h2>
<h1>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Lascaux</span></span></h1>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"></span><br />
<section class="details-wrap" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; bottom: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1a1a1a; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; height: 303px; left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 4px; opacity: 0; padding: 0px 0px 0px 0.2em; position: absolute; text-align: center; transition: opacity 0.3s ease-out; vertical-align: baseline; width: 458px;"></section><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I
sit alone with the dark gods in the dark cave and wait.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">My
chanting joins with others, the unseen ones.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Flames
dance on the flat cave wall. I need to
see<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">the
pictures in my mind before I touch the paint.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Tonight
I will paint the great bull, the one who sweeps <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">the
sky with his horns and shakes the earth<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">with
his feet, the one who carries my arrowhead<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">in
the muscle of his hind leg. I will place
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">my
red-earthed hand over him and tomorrow<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">his
blood will be mine and the clan will feast.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Alone
I paint mind-pictures on the wall<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">but
at night all the men will come, every one<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">who
has left his boy years and bears the man-mark,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">the
hunters and fighters, protectors of the family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">We
will sip bitter juice and see the flames dance,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">then
up and stamp, jump and whirl, chant and<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">watch
my pictures come alive and move, hear <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">the
song of the gods and see tomorrow’s hunt.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">We
will feel the bull’s great bulk, see his chest heave,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">hear
his hooves like thunder in the ground.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">But
tomorrow he will be slowed, his flesh gnawed <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">by
the grinding flint, and we will run him down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Then
we will shout and sing and weep in praise<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">for
this great beast who ran and shook the earth,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">who
swung his horns and died standing, who now<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">will
feed our children for days and our stories for years. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">In
the dark cave with its dark gods and painted wall <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">the
unseen ones will wait for me to come again.</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-69820194228399329972017-02-05T14:42:00.002-08:002017-02-05T14:46:46.725-08:00<h2>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">
Free-writing exercise</span></h2>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">At the Writers Circle last week, after we'd read out our prepared pieces and heard other members' comments, we tried an exercise that frightens many people. Not just people; it frightens writers, though it shouldn't. </span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> It starts with a prompt of some kind, something to spark the imagination. It could be just a word, a phrase or a quotation. You might get to choose a picture, or be given a character and a situation.</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> It demands that you write quickly because time is limited. </span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> It demands that you write freely, uninhibited by thoughts of whether it's good or bad, explains itself perfectly or merely suggests possibilities, is fit for publication or only fit for the rubbish bin. (No, make that the recycle bin, because a writer should never throw anything away.)</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> Why does it send shivers through the spines of so many writers? Because in a very real way it takes away their control over their material, allows the subconscious to take over. You see appear on the paper under your pen or the screen in front of your eyes, words and phrases you didn't think about using. You didn't think; that's what's important.</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> That's what makes free-writing such a fantastic exercise.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> Often those phrases and words and sentences are more appropriate than you first thought - or with a little editing can be made so. The point is they don't have to be perfect right there and then; nobody's going to criticise it. It's only an exercise. You're practising. You're flexing your writing muscles in a different way.</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I do believe my enthusiasms are showing. I'll roll them up and put them away and show you what I wrote last week.</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">The prompts I was given were a quotation from Oscar Wilde: "An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all." and the cover of "Lady Chatterley's Lover" with an illustration showing a phoenix in the flames.</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I wrote this:</span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Like a phoenix aflame, the lust for life</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Flares, bares itself, scorns a danger</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">That dares discovery, flaunting itself,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Living to fullness again.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">In the dull mind, dull thoughts drift,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Muddied, sluggish and satisfied.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">No danger here, no shiver </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Of sudden fear, only the torpor</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Of nothingness, of mind death.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><i>I may make something of it one day.</i></span></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div>
<i><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> </span></i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-89781232059201186622017-01-28T15:20:00.002-08:002017-01-28T15:20:45.048-08:00<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>This blog's pageview stats tell me I'm getting a regular readership (or at least a "glancership") because it gets about 300 visits a day. The vast majority of you (6,685 last month) are in the USA.</i></span></span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>On the basis that some of you might be looking for a touch of escapism right now, here's a story that has more than a suggestion of escape in it. Enjoy!</i></span></span></div>
<h2>
<br /><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">The Longest Day</span></b></h2>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">Jeanne Laporte’s journey had started more than a
thousand miles away. Ahead was what could be the most difficult part, when the documents
she carried would be subjected to the closest scrutiny. Again she took the
little mirror out of her purse </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">and
touched her hair. That gave her the chance to check if anyone was watching her.
Even more important ly, she could briefly touch the papers that would be her
passport to freedom.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> There had
been many moments of doubt. A couple of times she’d nearly panicked. On the
station at Schaumburg, just before the train pulled in, when she thought she
was being watched by a man in an unfamiliar uniform; in the café at Henrieville
when she’d spilled coffee on her ticket, the little piece of card that had cost
her so much. She worried that it might be queried by the ticket-collector. With
every incident she‘d become more anxious. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> ‘Don’t
think about it,’ she said to herself, ‘Just do it. You’ve come this far. You’re
almost there.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Always
there was this feeling of being a stranger in an alien land. She knew the
language of course, but the accent was different here. There was no one to turn
to. She was on her own now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Sometimes
she had the feeling she was being followed. She resisted the temptation to
turn. ‘Feel confident and you’ll look confident,’ had been the advice.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Now it
was time for the last few steps, no more than the length of a football pitch. Just
stand up from her table at the pavement café, pay the bill (she hadn’t spilled
the coffee here - was that a good sign?), cross the street and enter the imposing
building facing her. In less than an hour, once the paperwork was completed,
she could be on another train, a train that would take her home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> Her new home.
The word had a different meaning now. No more looking over her shoulder. No
panic at the late-night knock on the door . Freedom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The highway out of town ran alongside the rail
tracks. Just before the road swung away northwards, Jeanne saw again the sign
she’d seen on the way into town. Now she saw it from the other side. “Al’s
Diner and Gas Station. Get filled up before you leave Reno. There’s a whole
lotta desert ahead.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">In
case you think I’ve invented the town names to suggest this “escape” story is set
in Europe</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> , <i>Schaumburg
is in Illinois and Henrieville is in Utah.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-59694013943768697962017-01-23T04:33:00.001-08:002017-01-23T04:33:24.986-08:00<h2>
<br /></h2>
<div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpFirst">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 18pt;">Safe at Last!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">It's well past the
middle of January, so it's probably safe for me to go out. The gods of split
eyebrows will have forgotten about me by now.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
The problems started on the 30th December 2014. I took Bess, our collie,
out for her afternoon walk about 4.30 as usual. It was pretty dark as well as
cold; Aberdeen is further north than Moscow and even some parts of
Alaska. <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> I
didn't realise it was icy underfoot till I was in the middle of a bumpy rough
track leading to the woods. I tried to step carefully but my feet slid from
under me and I crashed down on my left side. My head cracked on the frozen
ground. I felt the shock go right through me. <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> I
lay there for a few seconds, feeling sick, still holding Bess's lead and
calling for her to come back to me. I watched the blood dripping from my head.
I slid rather than crawled onto the grass where I could stand up.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
As usual, I didn't have a mobile phone with me; I hardly ever use it. Holding
my eyebrow together with a folded tissue, I staggered back home. Martha cleaned
the cut, examined it with a trained nurse's eye and said, <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> 'That eyebrow needs
stitching - and the other one's twitching. <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
You look like you've been in a fight.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
Blood's still flowing free, so you'll have to agree <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
That's it for the rest of the night.' <b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;">
(She always speaks in verse during the pantomime season.)<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> At Aberdeen Royal Infirmary they stitched me
together and kept me in overnight in case the pain on my left side was an
incipient heart problem. It wasn't; just bruising.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> That was 2014. Fast forward to 30th December 2015:
same dog; same day; same time; different walk. Passing the library I saw a
football abandoned in the car park, just sitting there waiting to be kicked. I
can never resist a football. I took a run and whacked it against the library
wall. It bounced off at an angle and I chased after it to try again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> I didn't see the kerb that marks the parking spaces
but I did notice that the ground came up very fast to meet my face. Not again!
In seconds the other eyebrow was doing its best to incarnadine the car park -
and making a pretty good job of it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> This time I was farther away from home so I had to
call Martha and she brought the car to pick me up. Though I looked like one of
Mike Tyson's sparring partners for a few days, this eyebrow didn't need any
embroidery. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 14pt;"> Needless to say, on 30th December 2016 I trod very
carefully whenever I stepped outside the house.</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
<div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-21429036653776576972017-01-13T10:43:00.000-08:002017-09-25T08:02:49.874-07:00Behind Every Caveman<h3>
</h3>
<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>This is, or might have been, the story of the world's first great inventor.</i></span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>(22.49 Greenwich Meantime, UK. I've just discovered that this post has been sitting here for about four hours in a solid block of sans serif type, unformatted and all in caps. Goodness knows what happened. I shall now try to fix it. Apologies all round.)</i></span></h3>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>23.15 Failed again. Put it down to Friday the 13th!</i></span><br />
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>14.30, 17th: last try!</i></span></div>
<h2>
<div class="MsoTitle">
<h3>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Behind every Caveman</span></h3>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">When Wyzat the Inquisitive struck the first-ever spark off the first-ever flint, Mrs Wyzat was not impressed.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'Listen! I work my fingernails off gathering nuts and berries, and what do you do? You sit in here banging stones together and burning the mammoth steaks for dinner. Are you listening to me? Where are you going now?'</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'I won't be long. Must get back to the drawing slate. Just had an idea.'</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'Another idea! Well, don't fill the cave full of smoke with this one. You're worse than that idiot who thinks he's an artist, painting dirty great animals all over people's caves faster than I can rub them off. Think yourself lucky you've got a cave-proud wife, not like that Mrs Ugg Lazybitch in three down. I haven't forgotten that you fixed up a pretty little sling thing to stop her oversize baby-feeders from wobbling about. And - don't think I didn't hear you offer to fit it for her.'</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'That was totally impersonal, my sweet. I'm a thinker, an inventor. I like to make things that other people haven't thought of.'</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'Well, make something useful for a change. The twins are getting too big to carry around. My back feels like I've been building bluestone henges all week. Why don't you make me a something - I don't know - something I can roll them around in?'</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> 'Roll?' pondered Wyzat, gazing at the full moon, 'Roll?'</span></span></div>
</h2>
<h2>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></h2>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-71579913164953962902017-01-06T07:31:00.000-08:002017-01-06T07:31:09.514-08:00<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>A true story to start 2017.</b></i></span><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Readers Stateside need to be aware that I'm talking soccer here, not the American brand of football. And the era will be ancient history to many readers - an era when our boots had hard leather toecaps, the ball never swerved unless there was a high wind, and overlapping full-backs hadn't been invented.</i><br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 18.0pt;">Two and a Half
Moments of Glory<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">I
was always a left back at football, even in my schooldays – and I don’t mean
the old joke, “left back in the dressing-room”. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I never scored, of course; full backs then
didn’t aspire to scoring goals. We were defenders, pure and simple. Our job was
to clatter the opposing winger, over the touch-line if possible. Getting the
ball as well was a bonus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> If we chanced to stray anywhere near the opponents’
territory, our legs started to shake; crossing the halfway line meant a full-on
nose-bleed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I said “always a left back”. That was true,
until my last year at secondary school, when a newcomer usurped the position
I’d held for four years. Four years of faithful service, chasing speedy
wingers, tripping up inside-forwards and stopping free kicks with my face – all
counted for nothing when that new boy arrived. He was tall and sort of good-looking,
I suppose, in a Teutonic kind of way. Certainly the girls from the nearby
convent school seemed to think so. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> He was Peter von Manteuffel – a German,
for Pete’s sake!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> We’d just spent six years beating the
schnitzel out of them all over Europe, and they had the gall to send one of
their blond-haired blue-eyed Aryan supermen to steal the affections of the
flower of our girlhood and my place in the school team.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> He did that in the usual sneaky German way,
by being faster, fitter and great at taking penalties. His name meant
“Man-Devil”. What can you expect?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Later, in the Army, I played for the
Intelligence Corps Depot, then for our unit team in Cyprus, on sun-baked
pitches that had never seen a blade of grass – murder on your knees if you went
to ground – and still never scored a goal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Then I came to Aberdeen, 32 years old,
married with two sons but still a goal-scoring virgin. I played for YMCA
Rovers. One Saturday I turned up at Hazlehead but found we already had a full
team. I looked around the other pitches and saw that Castle Rovers were one
short.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Do you need one more, boys?’ I asked. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Aye, fit’s yer name?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘Don.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> ‘OK, Tom,. You’re centre-forward.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Centre-forward! Ah, well, a game’s a game.
I can go and hide afterwards.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> We got a corner on the left in our first
attack. I was as short then as I am now, so I didn’t stay in the middle to try
to outjump their six-foot defenders. I ran towards the corner to lure one of
them away from the goalmouth. Our corner-taker, instead of lofting the ball
towards the goal as I expected, saw me, mistook me for a proper centre-forward
and passed it straight to my feet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Not me, you idiot! I’m a full-back. What
do I do now? The defender was right behind me. I jinked to the left to go
infield, then cut back towards the goal-line. Not exactly your Johan Cruyff but
it worked - fooled him completely. I still savour that moment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I chipped the ball high into the
goalmouth; one of our boys rose above the defenders and headed it into the net.
One-nil to Castle Rovers; slaps on the back for Tom (aka Don). We didn’t do
hugging and I would have been appalled to be underneath a writhing mass of
celebrating sweaty bodies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Early in the second half it got even
better. I cut in from the right with the ball at my feet and banged over a
hopeful left foot cross towards the far post. Next thing I knew, my team were
celebrating their second goal. The ball had sneaked in at the top corner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Our third goal was a carbon copy of the
second. I found myself in the same position and thought,’Why not?’ Into the net
it went. The crowd of seven men, one mum and a dog went crazy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Pinpoint
accuracy. As if I’d been working on it for years. David Beckham, eat your heart
out! “Bend it like Don (or Tom).”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> But
even the short report in the Evening Express got my name wrong: “Castle Rovers
beat Northfield 3-0. Scorers were Buchan and Will (2).”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I wonder if old Rovers players sit around now
with their arthritic hips and replacement knees, nursing their pints and
telling tales of the legend who was Tom Will, the mystery man who appeared out
of nowhere, gave a false name, won the game for them, then disappeared, never
to be seen again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-9520447228475649112016-12-30T10:37:00.000-08:002016-12-30T10:37:27.048-08:00<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">Two contrasting poems to round off the year. The first is based on a Christmas party many years ago, or at least my memory of it. The second will set a few linguistic puzzles for non-Scots speakers. </span></i><i><span style="font-size: large;">Pageview stats tell me I've got lot of readers, or at least viewers, in the US. Best of luck, guys!</span></i></span></h3>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Christmas Party Afterglow<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">The beach at
Aberdeen begins to wake<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">as morning-after
leaves the night-before.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We race the sea through
moon-edged shadows, jump <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">the ripples in sea-wee’d
shoes and wonder why<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">our drunken
laughter slips on wetted sand<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">and why the world
looks better upside-down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We left the party draped
about the room,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">all snoring in a
non-existent chord.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">But Robbie and I still
buzzed with energy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We could not let this
party drift and sink.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">And so we sang a
farewell to the night,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 6.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">then raced the waking
day along the beach.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Hogmanay Blues<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;"> </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">First-fittin’ aul’ freen’s at the turn o’ the year<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Brings mony a lach an aft a wee tear.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">A’ nicht we stagger fae stairheid tae hoose,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Swappin’
banter wi’ strangers an’ quines on the loose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Ower tae
Torry tae see Auntie Nell. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Then, quick,
on the bus! Get awa’ fae the smell.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Up tae the West
End far Jeremy bides;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">He wis Jezza
in Northfield, oor Meggie confides.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Noo wir bottles o’ fusky are teem’t oot, ma son<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">An’ we rummle wir pooches fer crumbs o’ black bun, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">We’re totally founert an’ ma stummick’s gey queer,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-latin;">Bit we’ll dae it a’ ower again the next year.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-11190832725665885972016-12-23T14:07:00.000-08:002016-12-23T14:07:26.550-08:00<h2>
<i>Growing the Page</i></h2>
<h3>
<i style="font-weight: normal;">Something (or rather, a lot of someones) is lifting this blog into a range of viewing figures I have not seen before. I can't pretend it's breaking any records in the blogging world, having read about some blogs with pageview figures in the millions range, but it is on the up. It may not yet be in the fast lane, but it's edging nearer the slip road onto the motorway.</i></h3>
<h3>
<i style="font-weight: normal;"> Whoever you are, thank you for reading, or at least glancing at, what I have to offer. If you'd like to offer a comment as well, complimentary or carping, dogmatic or derisory, I'd be delighted. </i></h3>
<h3>
<i style="font-weight: normal;"> I was going to wait till New Year before posting anew, but received wisdom says one needs to post regularly, at least once a week, to keep and grow readership.</i></h3>
<h3>
<i style="font-weight: normal;"> So here's a little piece of whimsy to launch this blog into 2017.</i></h3>
<h2>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">
McGill's Last Laugh</span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-weight: normal;"><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">'Leave it, Vince! You </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">ain't</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">gunna</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> look at every bloody postcard, are </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">yer</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">?'</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; color: windowtext; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span><br />
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{150}" paraid="1774862869" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">'Nah, just these. I'll meet you at the chip shop. </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">Nothin's</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">startin</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">' before two o'clock. I'll be there on the beach, to give the Mods a good kicking.'</span></span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{155}" paraid="820263938" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">Just the usual seaside postcards - fat old ladies, skinny blokes and cheeky kids – except one was different. There was this bloke done up like a pirate and a snooty old woman looking shocked. I forget the joke; what made me look again was that the pirate was advertising “Treasure Trips Round the Bay”.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{160}" paraid="1866403166" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">Every other card in the rack card said clearly “Pleasure Trips”; I checked 'em. Only one said “Treasure”.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" xml:lang="EN-GB">U</span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;" xml:lang="EN-GB">nder that were two squiggly lines like tiny writing. I bought that card and a magnifying glass. </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"> </span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{170}" paraid="137070563" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I sat on the bench outside and peered at the lines. They said: “I n the bay that's owned by no living man, on an island that rowers will understand.” On the back of the card was printed “Blackstone 14YN22NE.X,”</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> like a catalogue number or something. No other card had that.</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{175}" paraid="1380652880" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">What was all that about? I remembered reading Treasure Island when I was a kid. I tried to tell myself to be sensible. Nobody finds treasure maps, these days. Or do they? </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{180}" paraid="1401306728" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">I forgot all about meeting up with the gang, forgot about the Mods and their dopey anoraks and their putt-putt lawnmower </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">Lambrettas</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">. I kicked the Matchless into a roar and headed back to the Smoke, breaking the speed limit most of the way.</span></span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{185}" paraid="2024243813" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> I hardly slept that night. </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">In the library Monday morning, I chased up the librarian for atlases and lists of places – gazetteers, she called them. Didn't stop for a coffee, had nothing to eat. It was well after three before I got lucky.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{189}" paraid="1536184227" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">I'd been looking for the name of an island that might have something to do with rowing - Oar Island, Crew, Stroke, Bow, even Oxford or Cambridge Island. That librarian was giving me the old "You again?" treatment when I kept asking for more maps. Then one name jumped out of the page: Skull Island, same sound as scull in rowing. It was in the </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">Caribbean</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">, a little dot south of Puerto Rico, so small there were no maps of it. </span></span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{192}" paraid="1226332539" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; text-align: center; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">#</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{196}" paraid="821844941" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I had to sell the bike to pay for the trip. A one way ticket. I finally got to a place from where I could see this Skull island. The locals told me nobody lived on it but there was a place called Dead Man's Bay. </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{201}" paraid="1878593868" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I'd found it! My treasure. </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{206}" paraid="875042507" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">Old Diego took me across in his little boat. I left him on the beach gutting a fish he'd caught. I headed inland and started to search. I'd worked out the code long ago. It didn't take long to find a black rock in a clearing. From there I paced out 14 yards north and 22 northeast and started to dig. I heard Diego shouting, 'Da fish, she cooked, man!' just as my spade struck something hard. I cleared the earth away and dragged out a wooden box. The hinges were almost rusted away and I broke them easily.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{211}" paraid="1132888712" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">There was no treasure. </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{216}" paraid="455564082" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> There was only a </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">giant postcard, sealed in wax paper, showing that same leering pirate and the snooty woman, and he's saying, 'Oi never said “treasure”, lady. Oi said </span><span class="SpellingError SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; background-image: url("data:image/gif; background-position: left bottom; background-repeat: repeat-x; border-bottom: 1px solid transparent; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">Oi'm</span><span class="NormalTextRun SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> after me pleasure!'</span></span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;">#</span></span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{221}" paraid="1709174193" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I never did go home. 'Course I was disappointed at first, but, you know what, these people took me in as if I was one of their own. </span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{226}" paraid="1751141767" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I can sit on the beach now with my Josefina. I love to smell the perfume in her hair while she tells me how it'll be when we get married. I helped to build the church, you know. We're going to live in the house that the villagers are getting ready for us. </span></span></div>
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{226}" paraid="1751141767" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> You know what I'm doing to earn some dosh? Don't laugh. I'm teaching English. Me, from South London! The kids'll all grow up speaking like Bob Hoskins. 'Oskins, more like. </span></span></div>
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{226}" paraid="1751141767" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> The Mods can rule over all the beaches in England if they want, and you know what, I don't give a hairy parka.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="OutlineElement Ltr SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: white; clear: both; cursor: text; direction: ltr; font-size: 8px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; padding: 0px; position: relative; user-select: text;">
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{231}" paraid="2106048015" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB"> </span><span class="TextRun SCX196403205" lang="EN-GB" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;" xml:lang="EN-GB">I've found the only treasure I need.</span><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{231}" paraid="2106048015" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{231}" paraid="2106048015" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"><i>Donald McGill was a cartoonist whose saucy seaside postcards have become collectable.</i></span></span></div>
<div class="Paragraph SCX196403205" paraeid="{2a3241aa-3284-4c19-a081-ea1dd6dc8891}{231}" paraid="2106048015" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; background-color: transparent; color: windowtext; padding: 0px; user-select: text; vertical-align: baseline; word-wrap: break-word;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="EOP SCX196403205" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; -webkit-user-drag: none; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 20px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; user-select: text;"><i>The Mods (Moderns) wore anoraks (or parkas) and rode mopeds or scooters; the Rockers were black-leather bikers who despised the Mods. In English seaside resorts during the summer of 1964 there were pitched battles between the gangs.</i></span></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-71968642803521625692016-12-17T07:45:00.001-08:002016-12-17T07:45:45.886-08:00<h3>
<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i>Last offering of the year. See you, whoever you may be, in 2017.</i></span></h3>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 20.0pt;">First Christmas <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">I didn’t
expect this. I don’t suppose anyone does. But there’s a difference with me: Somehow I know what's happening. Others in this situation aren’t even aware of it, except in the most basic way.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Well, I can’t do anything about it now –
just got to accept it. I’ll play along just now, pretend I’m like all the
others doing the same thing tonight. You’d think Dad would have warned me,
given me some hint what was in store.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> The smell, for instance. I’m not sure I
can stop myself throwing up. What kind of place is this? It stinks. To be honest – and
forgive me if I’m causing offence – but it smells of shit. It’s not
people-shit, I know that much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> And the noise! Whatever these creatures
are, they are not being quiet about it. There’s a great hairy thing with a huge
head making such a racket right beside my ear. Braying. Yes, that’s the only
word for it. And an even bigger, stupid-looking thing with horns, breathing all
over me and trying to lick me with a huge floppy tongue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> Who are all these people coming in now,
gawping at me? They smell too, probably been out in the fields all night. Did
they run all the way here just to see me? Am I worth all this fuss? <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I certainly don't need all this gold and incense that the latest visitors have brought.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I mean, there I was, warm and snug as you
like, floating around,not even needing to breathe, a soft rhythmic beat to
soothe me, all the nourishment I needed, not a care in the world. Then without warning, I found myself pushed
out into a world of noise and stench and pain. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I felt some pain, yes, but nothing like
hers. Poor girl, she was howling with it, right up till the moment I popped out
and took over. Well, she’s only young. Perhaps she’s never felt pain like that
before. I don’t know her yet but I know she belongs to me and I belong to her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> I haven’t opened my eyes properly but I
know she’s looking down at me. She’s so tired. Her hair is plastered to her
brow, soaked in sweat. Then she reaches out her arms, takes me and holds me
close. I can feel the warmth and the softness. I turn my face towards her
softness and smell the warm milk that will nourish me and bring me closer to
her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"> There is a love in her face that I never
knew existed. All the people of the world must have known a love like this. If that is so, why am I needed here?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-82761266998065444832016-12-10T03:47:00.001-08:002016-12-11T13:33:18.509-08:00<br />
<br />
<i>To all those overwhelmed by the glut of goodwill and the cascade of Christmas cards, not to mention the frantic aura of festivity, I offer this possibility of a calm and stress-free Yuletide:</i><br />
<h2>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 36.0pt;">Whereas</span><span style="font-size: 36.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 24.0pt;">the holder of
this Certificate</span><span style="font-size: 36.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></h2>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">. . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">has demonstrated over many
years her/his disillusionment with the end of year activity known as “Merry
Christmas”, he/she is granted this <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: red; font-size: 36pt;">Certificate of Exemption</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">from all pseudo-festivity,
induced jollity and contrived bonhomie,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">also from all card sending
and receiving,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">gift giving, gift guilt and
gift recycling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">and from any <i>pretence</i> at
religious or spiritual affiliation<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: red; font-family: "old english text mt"; font-size: 18.0pt;">provided that<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">she/he shall maintain a
cheerful disposition, a tolerant attitude and <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">a generous nature throughout
the year<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: red; font-family: "old english text mt"; font-size: 18.0pt;">notwithstanding<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">occasional bouts of gloom,
girning or grumpiness<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">not amounting to more than
7.2 hours (1%) in any calendar month<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">(in December this dispensation
may be doubled).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "old english text mt"; font-size: 18.0pt;">However,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">none of the above exemptions
shall apply when <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">in the company of or within
the hearing of any child <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">who is still at the
“wonderment” stage of life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: red; font-family: "old english text mt"; font-size: 18.0pt;">Given under our Hand,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "freestyle script"; font-size: 24.0pt;">Don Wells (aka
B.A.Humbugg)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">. . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Hon Secretary<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #00b050; font-family: "old english text mt"; font-size: 28.0pt;">The
Noel Abatement Society<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i>The certificate has been found to be at its most effective when
prominently displayed in your entrance hall, well above toddler height but in
full view of early-doors <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i>carol-singers, persistent good-cheer merchants and once-a-year drunks.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-14317417249415002002016-11-30T08:16:00.000-08:002016-12-07T14:36:09.458-08:00<h2>
A Nonsense Verse</h2>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h3>
In view of the weather - and the season - I've decided to go Lewis Carrolling.</h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">
Glinterseen</span></h2>
<div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">'Tis brillig. Even turvid geese</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Scrab and skibble on the ice.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">All plegged in frost, the mangleferns</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Now stand like branklets in a vice.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Beware the Blizzapest, my friend; </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Never let it griff your prawl;</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Flink before your crastanates</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Become entrundled in its grawl. </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But now, too late! The Blizzapest</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dispaculates the wintled ground,</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Plittering the undergroan</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And cratting rocks that dring besound.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Glinterblades skiddance on ice;</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Grundling stones zoom round the shpeel.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">While the brattering Blizzapest</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.6667px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Friddens all within its greel.</span><span id="docs-internal-guid-4e5ffdd1-b603-57f5-5386-88d10f7e7145"></span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.666666666666664px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.6667px; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Enjoy your weather, wherever you are; and enjoy, as best you can, </i></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 18.6667px; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>the dreaded Frantic Season.</i></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-84830087519220595342016-11-21T14:08:00.000-08:002016-11-21T14:17:40.180-08:00<h3>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-large;">Time-bomb!</span></h3>
<h3>
Since it's still November, you can have a last blast from my wartime past.</h3>
<div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Most people in Britain now would recognise the aerial
photograph I saw in a magazine. The outline of the Isle of Dogs and the
meanders of Bow Creek have become an iconic television opening sequence. But
this pilot’s eye view gave me a shudder that had nothing to do with the start
of “Eastenders”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> The photograph
was dated 24.5.39; the notes beside it were in German; two target circles
marked A and B were uncomfortably close to my grandparents’ house at 107 St
Paul’s Road in Bow. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> On September 7<sup>th</sup>
1940, the house was full. It was a farewell party for my two uncles before they
went back to active service with the RAF. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> Air raid sirens
began to wail just after teatime. There were too many of us to go into the
Anderson shelter dug into the back garden, shored up with timber and corrugated
iron and covered with a thick layer of earth. We tried to make ourselves
comfortable in the cellar. It would turn out to be a long night. As in many
houses, it had been prepared for an emergency with beds and chairs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> There had been light
raids by the Luftwaffe in the preceding weeks but no one was prepared for this
onslaught. By the end of the night, nearly a thousand bombers had attacked the
central area of London and the East End. It went on for hours. We could hear
the bombs falling and the explosions when they landed. I can’t remember being
frightened; I’d heard bombs before. Some of the children managed to sleep. My brother
Brian was under three; two of our cousins were even younger. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> At some time in
the night, one particular sound grew louder, coming nearer . – the sound of a
falling bomb. One of my uncles shouted, ‘This one’s close! Get down!’ Every
adult grabbed the nearest child and held it. This is my clearest memory of that
day, because nobody grabbed me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> There was an
ear-splitting crash, a concussion that shook the walls and the cellar filled
with dust.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> The cellar walls
were cracked but still standing. My uncles went to investigate. They climbed
from the cellar up to my parents’ bedroom on the first floor, looked up and saw
stars and searchlight beams, even the planes overhead. There was another huge
hole in the bedroom wall. They climbed through and followed the diagonal trail
of destruction down into next door’s cellar. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> During their
service, they had seen many a bomb before but there in the concrete floor, in a
crater of its own making, was one of the biggest. Mercifully, the neighbours
were in their shelter in the back garden.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> ‘My God, Ernie, the bloody thing’s ticking!’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> They rushed back
to us. ‘We’ve got to get out. There’s a bomb next door – delayed-action.
Everyone, quick as you can! No, no time to stop for anything. Go as you are.
The whole house could blow up any minute!’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> We crowded into a large public shelter in
Robeson Street. Someone found the ARP wardens and they evacuated the area. At
three o’clock in the morning we heard the massive detonation as “our” bomb
exploded. It took half the terrace with it - six substantial Victorian houses.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"> Only one thing worth
salvaging was picked out of the rubble. My brother still has it: a heavy
cut-glass vase about fourteen inches tall.
It was found on a sofa, covered by the cushions that had fallen on it. It
is perfect, except for one little chip on the base.</span><span style="font-family: "cambria" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-84701544018801954572016-11-11T08:02:00.000-08:002016-11-11T08:02:04.826-08:00<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">My personal contribution to Remembrance Day:</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<b><span style="font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%;"></span><br /></b>
<div style="background-color: white; font-family: "Times New Roman", Times, serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Edward Wells (1897 -1917)</b></span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;"> </span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">My uncle's first name has become my second.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">It shares the fate of many middle names -</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">half a dozen boxes of identity,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">never used except for routine forms.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; font-family: "Times New Roman", Times, serif;">
<br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">He was my father's hero, elder brother,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">leading, laughing, bold, a shooter's eye.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">'Give Ted two stones, he'd knock a robin's egg</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">right off that five-bar gate across the road.'</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;"> </span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">He volunteered as sniper in the War,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">Exposed and isolated, drawing fire,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">Never laughing now but leading still,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">And at the last – a German sniper's kill.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">They buried him at Arras. Soldiers home</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">told young Johnny how his brother fell.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">At fourteen years, he held his grief within,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">until the telegram of death arrived.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">I'm holding Edward's prayer-book, sprayed with blood.</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">Inside, his simple, pencil-written will,</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">neatly signed as “Private Edward Wells” -</span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;">my boxes of identity come home. </span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;"> </span><br /><span style="font-size: 18.6667px;"><i>Donald Edward Wells</i> </span><br /></div>
<span style="font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-65232951083303698372016-09-15T13:46:00.000-07:002016-12-17T11:07:40.206-08:00<span style="font-size: large;"><em style="font-size: medium;">If you are seeking stories of my late friend and former colleague <b>Kyril Bonfiglioli, </b>novelist, wit, raconteur and kni</em><i style="font-size: medium;">fe-thrower, you need to look a lot further back.<b> </b>Only the first nine posts of this blog are concerned wholly or in part with his exploits <strong>(posts from 31st March to 23rd July 2013)</strong> plus a "Mentioned in Despatches" on <b>9th January 2014</b>. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: medium;">If I have any followers, other than drop-in thrill-seekers whose random googling may have trawled up the word "concupiscence" from my May 3rd 2013 entry (don't rush to look it up; it's not that exciting), I apologise for the extended hibernation of this blog. From now on, </span><span style="font-size: medium;">I will get back to blogging once a week.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: medium;">This is a special one. Well, it's special to me.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: whitesmoke; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18.5714px;"> </span></span><span style="color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif"; font-size: 18pt; font-weight: bold;">I Was a Vestival Virgin</span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"bold","size":18},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"bold","size":18}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; font-size: 18pt; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<br /></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">It was the best of times; it was my first time. It was the Festival of Writing at York, squeezed between an early September break in Dumfries and a late September holiday in Spain.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">The good people at Writers' Workshop had gathered some three hundred writers, give or take a pseudonym. Many were published, most were aspirant, all eager to mingle, laugh with and learn from other writers. There was also a healthy sprinkling of publishers, agents, </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">editors, and </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">“book doctors” a</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">s well as</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> an </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">indispensable</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> army of willing helpers to guide and encourage us. The mix was heady. The chat was non-stop.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">We went from discussion to workshop, from pitching to self-pub (not a free bar, sorry). We took the hundred word challenge, plotted, re-wrote and climaxed, learned the secret of stealth sentences and stuck post-it notes all over the furniture.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">Then came the “one-to-one” sessions with book doctors, </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">editors</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> and agents, approached nervously by some, welcomed by others. Contrary to old writers' tales about </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">edi</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">tors, they do not all subscribe to the mantra of Sir Lancelot Spratt – 'Cut it out, man. Cut it out!'. They were willing to guide and encourage us, suggest new approaches and, yes, cut where necessary.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">At the workshops, though the presenter</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">s</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> might be speaking to forty or fifty people, I found many direct connections to my own work-in-progress. 'Yes, </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">I see now, </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">that's what I was doing when I brought in the woman </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">who</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> distracted my hero from his quest.' and then, 'I'll have to change that bit – or possibly move it to later in the story'. I was scribbling reminders to myself as fast as I could and trying to listen to the next piece of good advice.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">Now it's bragging time.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">At my one-to-one with an agent whom I shall not name, in case he later changes his mind, he had nice things to say about my novel, ' Minder meets Lovejoy '; 'I like Gregor – touch of the Flashman about him'; 'Dennis Price in “Kind Hearts and Coronets”, acid turns of phrase, well-written, understated'; 'the wit is a bit out of time but refreshingly not modish'; and beside a short passage in the first chapter: 'Ha, ha! Brilliant!'</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">He did sound a note of caution. 'It won't be easy to place.'</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">This agent represents such literary lights as James Follett (not Ken) with 20 novels, translated into 11 languages and radio and TV plays including the cult series “Blake's 7”; RD Wingfield, author of the “Frost” novels and TV series; George Markstein, creator of “The Prisoner”; oh, and Aberdeen's own Stuart McBride.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">Before you tell me Markstein and Wingfield are dead, he was their agent while they lived and continues to represent their estate.</span></div>
<div class="zw-paragraph" data-format="{"en_wo":false,"supressAutoHyphens":true,"ts":{"fw":"none","size":16},"type":"paragraph"}" data-textformat="{"fw":"none","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-top: 0in; position: relative;">
<span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">I cannot say I have an agent but I </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","fs":"italic","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif"; font-style: italic;">can </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">say I have an agent interested. He wants to see the manuscript as soon as it's finished.</span></div>
<span class="zw-portion" data-doc-rid="2aifu2d1a1fb295e94a258e81273f921f5b31" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> </span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">Now it's bum-on-chair and nose-to-</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";">keyboard</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif";"> time</span><span class="zw-portion" data-format="{"fgc":"rgb(0,0,10)","ff":"Liberation Serif","fw":"none","type":"text","size":16}" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #00000a; font-family: "liberation serif"; font-size: 16pt;">.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281626181296858705.post-26218487049306127062016-05-29T10:51:00.000-07:002017-09-25T08:27:33.856-07:00<em></em><br />
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: medium; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration-color: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;">
</div>
<br />
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: medium; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0px; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-decoration-color: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;">
<em>Usual warning to those seeking my memories of late friend and former colleague<span> </span><b>Kyril Bonfiglioli,<span> </span></b>novelist, wit, raconteur and kni</em><i>fe-thrower:<b><span> </span></b>only the first nine posts of this blog are concerned wholly or in part with his exploits<span> </span><strong>(posts from 31st March to 23rd July 2013)</strong><span> </span>plus a "Mentioned in Despatches" on 9th January 2014. </i></div>
<h2>
You'll have to read the next six posts backwards!</h2>
<h4>
What I mean, of course, is that you'll need to read these next six posts in the correct order starting with Part 1. But of course, you knew that already, didn't you?</h4>
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Parting the Veils – Part 6</span><br />
<br />
Once the little girl’s eyes had closed in sleep, Virren feel it was safe to move. They slipped cautiously between the veils once more. Aestrid was becoming used to the unusual sensation. Although she could feel her feet touching the ground, her body seemed to have no weight. Sometimes they moved so fast that the veils were a whirling mass of changing colour.<br />
Virren told her, ‘When we next come out from the veils, we shall be more than a day’s journey from Merdegar’s palace. Don’t ask me how it happens, No matter what men say, Virren Lightstepper does not know everything. There is one thing that is the same here as it is in our world: North is North and South is South. I can navigate here just as your father navigates the seas of our world.’<br />
In a deserted spot they emerged beside another well to drink and Aestrid was able to wash her face. It was almost recovered from its earlier puffiness. The memory of that and their flight from the palace brought back the thought of the brave boys who had died for her.<br />
Virren saw her grief. ‘Do not weep, child. You still think of them as your playmates but I tell you, when your father asked for help, they knocked full-grown men over in their eagerness to offer their swords.<br />
‘Now, no more tears. The next journey between the veils will be our last. When we next step through into our own world, we will be close to your father’s hall. For the last time, Aestrid and Virren passed between the veils where time and space and distance worked in a different way.<br />
When they emerged, it was into a dark street in the port of Oran where her father’s ships still rode at anchor. Aestrid recognised the large building where her father’s crews lodged.<br />
‘Is my father . . ?’ she began, but Virren paid no heed. He took her arm in a firm grip and led her towards the entrance. The doors opened immediately.<br />
The hall, smaller than the Great Hall at home, was bright with the light of a hundred torches. Somehow all of her father’s men had crowded inside. The massed ranks stood, in full armour, at each side, leaving only a narrow passage the length of the hall. At the far end sat the imposing figure of the Sea-Wolf, Leif Gustavsson.<br />
‘Father!’ Aestrid cried and started to run towards him.<br />
‘Stand still!’ bellowed her father in the voice that could be heard above a North Sea storm.<br />
Aestrid stopped, bewildered. ‘Father, please,’ she begged.<br />
In a second, Virren was beside her. ‘Listen,’ he said. As I have told you so many times – stop thinking only of yourself and listen!’<br />
Leif Gustavsson addressed the assembled warriors.<br />
‘This girl, this girl who is not yet a woman, disobeyed me. This girl, who has been allowed to run wild since her mother died ten years ago, has kept us sweating in this stinking port of the desert people for days. She has caused the death of two of our finest young men. They became warriors for one day, then heroes in Valhalla the next. Remember forever the names of Ragnar and Ulf, sons of Svein Redbeard!’<br />
A great shout went up and the hall rang with the sound of swords on shields and stamping feet and over all, the names of Ragnar and Ulf Sveinsson.<br />
He turned his gaze on his daughter. ‘What do you say to this – you who bear my name?’<br />
Aestrid’s body shook and her tears flowed.<br />
‘I cannot find words for my grief. Ragnar and Ulf were like my brothers. Now they have given their lives for me. I ask their forgivemess. I ask your forgiveness, Father. I cannot bear to lose your love.’ She sank to her knees.<br />
Leif Gustavsson could sit no longer. Hecame striding down the hall and took his daughter up into his massive arms.<br />
‘Aestrid, my daughter, my lode-star of the heavens. You have come back. That is enough.’ Tears were running down his cheeks into his fierce red beard.<br />
Quickly he composed himself.<br />
‘Virren Lightstepper, stand by me.<br />
‘Hear me, my warriors, my Wolves of the Sea. This man has guided me, as he guided my father, for many years. Now he has rendered a service that I can never repay. He has brought my beloved daughter back across the empty miles of desert, back from the grip of an evil tyrant who would have despoiled her and kept her from me. All honour to Virren Lightstepper!’<br />
Again the hall erupted with the clash of weapons and voices roaring the name of Virren Lightstepper. Leif Gustavsson the Sea-Wolf raised his hand as the clamour died away.<br />
‘Tonight we feast and drink and sing the praises of the heroes of old and the heroes of today. Tomorrow we ride the seas again!’<br />
<br />
THE END<br />
<br />
(835 words) <br />
<br />
(Total: 5,650 words – too long for a short story, too short for any other known format. I’ll have to call it a mini-saga.)</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03797728944193436962noreply@blogger.com0